Knucklehead strings, with trailer shaved down to nearly two dimensions.
I like flat colors.
Guitar and bass, all in one convenient unit. Fire 1/4th of your band, less hands in the kitty, less hands eating studio snackcakes. Fool your friends.
The Togaman Guitarviol, a guitar which is played like a violin. I have created the Weaselman TubPia, a washtub which is played like a concert piano.
Then Tim and I both passed out and NAMM attendees dropped their Aramark fakewiches and ate our lifeless bodies, the end.