I was tootling around a Chinese grocery store the other day and saw packs of fireworks for sale in the middle of the candy display.
A pack of the mighty "HAW FLAKES" fireworks consisted of ten packed cylindrical rolls. LIGHT FUSE GET AWAY! But wait a minnit...
What's a firework doing with an ingredient list? And what the hell was a "HAW", anyway? Haw haw haw! Well, since the whole ten-pack cost thirty-nine cents, I figured what the hey.
When I got to work, I opened up one of the packages. This is what was inside.
There were about 27 discs inside. But look at that color! There was no way I was going to eat these babies until I figured out what "haw" meant - I didn't want to find out it was Chinese for "pig innards" after knocking down a pack.
Luckily there were a few mentions of Haw Flakes on "the internet" - "Haw" is short for "Hawthorne", the flower. Hey, lookit me, I'm eating a flower! Actually, it's the fruit. The taste was described as "fruit leather" (or, Fruit Roll-Ups), and is pretty accurate. You only want to eat one disc at a time, it's the perfect serving size - more than one and you lose the stellar chew profile.
The aftertaste, however, needs a little work. I would not take these on a roadtrip, for example. When eating Haw Flakes, make sure you're within reach of a toothbrush. It's not a particularly bad aftertaste, it just feels a little grating, like cornbread, for example.
Let's take a look at that ingredient list again.
1) Haw Flakes are Y2K compatible!
[ home | contact | archive | pixbarn ]