#4: Clowns, Devils, Bait
these issues don't have sample pages. you can't click on them. please stop.
#3: Sex & Kitchen Gadgets II
#2: Sex & Kitchen Gadgets I
#1: Death, Telephone, Scissors
not pictured:
#5: Eyes, Hearts, Hands
#6: Expanded Reprint of #1
2006feb17. Pre-emptive note: I have nothing to do with Craphound. There is currently no email address for Craphound. You want an issue? You want a back issue? Go here or at the very least here and search around. Don't email me. Seriously. You will be ignored, in the best-case scenario.
Crap Hound #1-#5
This article is less a review of Crap Hound than it is a hard sell. Sean
Tejaratchi started Crap Hound in September of 1994. Each issue has been
themed around two or three subjects; extensive subject-oriented clip-art
from hundreds of sources are crammed into the pages, along with witty
commentary and hand-drawn fonts.
"Many images in this issue are "owned" by lawsuit-friendly entities. Remember, folks: Crap Hound is scathing social commentary, and certainly not a collection of images with which to trample the fragile rights of huge corporations. Copyrights are held by individual owners. CRAP HOUND OFFICIALLY URGES YOU TO OBEY ALL LAWS, ALL THE TIME, AND ENCOURAGES COMPLETE SUBMISSION TO ALL FORMS OF AUTHORITY. HAVE A NICE DAY!"The themed contributor's page is worth the meager effort it takes to be included. Send Sean some clip-art, you're in. Your face will glow for weeks, your complexion will improve, your money and social problems will disappear.
"The popularity of clowns seems to operate like an urban legend. 'Eveyone loves clowns?' Bullshit. Total clown propaganda. Where are all these people? It's always someone else's grandmother, or their ex-girlfriend's cousin who loves them. During the six month creation of this issue, not a single person expressed a positive opinion of clowns. Children, the clown's so-called 'best friends,' hate and fear them with an unrivaled passion. Of all the feelings a clown can provoke, joy seems to be right down near the bottom of the list, probably next to 'thirst.' Someone should tell these fuckers that a deathly white mask and exaggerated, blood red features are not the express route to a child's heart."Future issues will be devoted to a wider arena of subjects (six or seven per issue). This fills me with a special warmth; of all the things I like about Craphound, the juxtaposition of themes is number one with a bullet. The Sex and Kitchen Gadgets two-parter put this idea into overtime. A page of kitchen beaters with the label "ADULTS ONLY," rolling pins next to dildos, Jiffy Pop next to sex-position diagrams, and, well, just Crisco.
"Sex is obviously a huge part of life, but it appears that publishers of graphic art resources find it easier to ignore the entire subject rather than print anything that might offend someone. Dover, the largest publisher of clip art, somehow finds it sensible to publish books dedicated to Horseless Carriages, Victorian Bathroom Fixtures, even Pennsylvanian Cornhusk Dolls, for Christ's sake. Sex, on the other hand, is apparently a bit too esoteric."Sean goes the distance to bring you the images you have to see.
{on obtaining images for the sex issues} "A highlight of recent weeks came when I got to stand in line at the supermarket with nothing but a can of Vaseline, a can of Crisco, a tube of KY jelly, and a package of condoms. No one said a word."