<x>, your friend has to leave now <“Six Million Dollar Man” theme song>.
I’ve got a friend with a goofy dad. And that dad married a far, far
goofier woman. A woman so neurotic that once they got married, none of us
were allowed in my friend’s house – not even to wait for a tow
truck (but that’s a different story). Just before they got married,
I was still allowed in the house, and my friend and I were playing stupid
computer games in the basement. Suddenly, the sounds of a domestic disturbance
broke out two floors above, followed by someone rapidly descending the stairs.
The basement door opened, and his dad shouted – “Sven!” (not
his real name) – “Your friend has to leave now!” I leapt
to my feet and fled, without even saying goodbye. When we recall this story
now, years later, my flight is performed in slow motion, to the tune of
The Six Million Dollar Man. Hopefully, you can find someone else to give
the command – then, in slow motion, stand up and begin running while
humming the song.
– Neal Manson (August 9, 1998)
Tags: personal