Gallstone #17

Sept 15, 1999

many things. i'm back from burningman, having culture-shock and trying to understand why i love going so much. moron that later.

i'm finally a doctor. real live, degree-in-hand DDS. the last few weeks has been an ordeal of black comedy. last week, the chair of preventive dentistry* told me, in no uncertain terms, that he would not clear me to graduate, because i had not taught enough people how to brush their fucking teeth. seriously. and he put up a pretty good *schoolyard bully* routine, but in the end i forced him to clear me without performing any stupid stunts for him, or even being polite. he better hope i never see him again. once he signed me off, i lost all motivation to be even civil.

next week, i'm driving to new orleans. anyone wanna go on a roadtrip? get here NOW.

last night, a friend of mine offered to get me into the greek theatre, to see jackson browne, bonnie raitt, and some other folksy types. not my cup of tea, but i figured life is too short. he had an all-access pass and went inside to bring out another pass for me. we had just downed a couple beers each on the way from the car to the gate.
i was standing there, by myself, kind of off in the dark alone, thinking about duality. here i am, 35 years old, a doctor, drinking beer in the parking lot and sneaking in on someone else's backstage pass. kid stuff, and here i am doing it. i hope i never grow up.
then these girls show up out of nowhere, blabbering to each other and trying to open their beers. i walk over and tell them i'm an expert beer-opener. i use the girls' swissarmy knife to crack their beers and they offer me one. of course i took it. meanwhile LAPD is biking around, looking for drinkers probably. so what? we're in the dark. and i'm still thinking, duality. "dentist arrested for public drinking!"
i tell the girls i just became a doctor, and they say i should take more beers. they have more than they can drink, and security isn't allowing any outside drinks. beck's, fresh ones, at the perfect drinking temp. thanks! they also insisted i take the swissarmy knife so i could open the beers. nice people.
i look at the knife as they walk away, and one side of it is decorated w/ a likeness of janus, the two-faced god and an archetype of man's inherent duality. freaky.
by the time my friend got back, i was two beers past him and had a cold beck's waiting for him. all in all a good night.

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