2007dec13. I was walking on a Berkeley sidewalk, coming up on a 17ish-year-old girl headed the other way. About 20 feet back, a guy roughly the same age. She’s about to pass me when she exclaims in a sarcastic/obnoxious voice, “OHHH! EXCUSE ME! SORRY!” as she’s forcefully chucking a paper grocery bag into my leg. I don’t know what was in it – felt like magazines. A friend figured the pair were pickpockets but there was no attempt to distract me into helping pick up the bag, she just kept on walking. He looked in the bag, didn’t see anything he wanted either, and continued on his way as well. Moments later, she was hit by a bus while crossing the street and I rifled through her purse. Karma: it’ll gitcha! I’m sad though, because I didn’t get a chance to tell her she was a cock. Gotta grab those moments, life is improv. Though ... if I had told her about the cock thing, we would have gotten into it and then she would have missed her bus ... and I’d be short some cash. So I think everything turned out okay.
