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Cardhouse
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2006sep02. Zug: The sexiest terramist ever. [via boing boing]

2006sep02. Saturday Latefreeday.

Colbert commencement speech [1 2 3].
Stewart & Colbert: Emmy presentin’.
Kraftwerk: Pocket Calculator live in Rome. The singer apparently messes up the Italian, but the audience lets him know they appreciate the effort. This was the first single I purchased back in ’23; the Japanese graphics that were on the sleeve are also displayed on the big screen behind the band.
Charlie Rose: Conan O’Brien.
Daily Show: Sasha Baron Cohen (2004).
Borat trailer #2.

2006sep04. TarProxy. A new technique for disabling spam while it’s being sent. Sounds delightful. I approve! [trumpets blare]

2006sep04. The other day I went to mail some letters and on the inside lip of the mailbox someone had pasted a small sticker on which was written: “You look great today!” So I said “Thank you, Mailbox!”

I don’t know why people stare sometimes.

2006sep05. Toss-away line overload.

2006sep06. You will enjoy Sonic Living. It is a thing which tells you when your bands are coming to your town. Or your towns, if you’re the jet-set type. I like that you can also see other people who are interested in the same acts you are. There are way too many people who have entered “Patsy Cline,” though. She will not be appearing anywhere in the near future. You should probably check this thing out. I am on there as “Cardhouse Robot.” You can be my friend. Then we will be friends! Disclaimer: I totally know one of the guys who is involved with this.

2006sep13. WorkDish. A user-submission job description site. Drunk driver.

2006sep14. Mail.

Hello,

I hope you don’t mind my asking a very odd question. Did Richard Dawson get his suits from Botany 500?

sincerley,

Jillian Oliver

According to several sources on the internet, this popular entertainer and host of the “The Family Feud” did indeed procure promotional consideration from Botany 500 in the form of stylish man-clothes. What is much odder than your question is that Richard Dawson is still alive. I thought he died three or four times like six years ago, so I figured now he’d be even deader. This is not the case.

2006sep14. CROUTONS.

2006sep14. UK writer Danny Wallace has many irons in the fire, and I’ve been out of the loop since reading Join Me, his karmic cult built up from a two-word advert placed in newspapers. His latest flight of fancy, a micronation named Lovely looks like something to investigate further. There’s a two-dvd set coming out in 2007. See also The Pursuit of Liberty.

2006sep14. Guardian: Danny Wallace, Yes Man.

2006sep14. The tortilla is under attack. It is being destroyed. Ask yourself: “What can I do about this?” Then realize your answer, to yourself, is: “Nothing.” At least you tried.

2006sep15. A small Friday Freeday, so I can watch the modifications to my “weblog” program melt down.

Daily Show: spliced Bush.
Jamie Foxx keeps the roast en pointe.
Danny Wallace invades Eel Pie Island, which is a half-horrible name for an island. Radio interview which was filmed then Youtubealized.

2006sep16. Mister Jalopy: The Hippopotamus Service. An excellent post about an excellent adventure into excellence in the form of the creation of a 144-piece porcelain service. The photographer’s “weblog,” Joined at the Hippo, has more photos and way more information about her day-to-day experiences [via boingboing].

2006sep16. Hello. A friend of mine is looking for an online business card printer that accepts EPS/AI etc files – not one that makes you use one of their horrid templates. If you have any suggestions along these lines, contact me. Thank you.

2006sep16. There is a new number at Phoneswarm. It is new.

2006sep16. I am making my way through Joined at the Hippo. I am in Taiwan. She is in Taiwan. She was in Taiwan. That is where I am. I am where she was, in Taiwan.

I made my way through the crowds and to a taxi which I got back to the hotel. I got back and did some picture transferring, and was interrupted by a phone call. The ring on the phone here sounds like a laser stun gun or something so I was startled to hear it ring. I picked it up and it was the Center for Disease Control. Hello, Sarah? Yes, I say. This is the Center for Disease and Control. and they go into how they saw that I had marked down on my SARS sheet yesterday about my tummy trouble and asked me a bunch of questions about when and where I got sick. I explained to them that I didn’t think that I had SARS and that instead it was just a bad orange juice that did me in, and the woman I was speaking to seemed ok with my answer and warned me to take medical action if I felt any worse.

And THAT is why, even when I felt like shit in Southeast Asia, I marked on my forms that I was as chipper as a tree chipper. How wonderful when governments try to hide things then go completely overboard in the opposite fashion when their little hidey-hole game causes too many dead bodies to pop up.

Singin’ SARS to the world
All the boys and girls
SARS to the fishes in the deep blue sea
SARS to you and me

SarrrrrrrrrRRRRRrrrrs, matey.

2006sep17. Mail.

The feed works for me now! Yay!

Yes. I forgot to mention that. If it did not work for you earlier, it may work for you now. If it doesn’t work for you now, it may work for you at a later date. I occasionally smack it around a bit.

2006sep20. Golf Memoir No. 3: the short course.

2006sep20. Outdoor pool, schmoutdoor pool.

2006sep20. Hand-sewn Domo-kun Ipod covers $20.

2006sep21. It’s a good word. That’s why it’s funny. Invest in barrels. “Barrels” is this year’s “squick” and/or “moist.”

2006sep22. Friday Freeday.

Borat: Best of [24 min].
Kylie Minogue: Come Into My World [4:20 min somewhere]. A video by Michel Gondry. Really can’t see the detail too well with the compression. Available on Director’s Series Vol 3.
Wonder Showzen: How Hot Dogs Are Made [2:29 min].
The Stonemen: Surf bluegrass instrumental [2 min].
Postal Service: We Will Become Silhouettes.
The Belgian thinks he’s a penguin [2 min].
Colbert: Better Know A Challenger [7 min].
Freaking brilliant: Paris Pours. An incisive infinite encapsulation of a non-career in nothing. It’s a little large for the dial-up set, from what I remember. [via deuce of clubs]
Letterman: Works at Taco Bell (1996).
Letterman: David Sedaris “Stadium Pal".
Arching archer Lilia Stepanova [2 min].

I came up with that myself. “Arching archer.” Quittin’ early today ... come on, I’m buying the first round.

2006sep25. Phoneswarm: a new phone number.

2006sep27. Bring it, Beef. A cartoon cat disses the Prius

2006sep29. Rockwell: Decimating the Constitution with Military Tribunals.

2006sep29. Friday Freeday.

The ro-bot is activated by saintly music [1:28 min].
Moonwalking bird [3:28 min].
Drive-in movie trailer thing: hot chocolate [21 sec].
Drive-in: corn dogs [3 sec]. I just repeat that one over and over.
Asylum Street Spankers: Stick Magnetic Ribbons on Your SUV [4:21 min]. Apparently I missed this when it was goin’ ‘round in April. Huh.

2006sep29. Mail.

Is there a Trader Joes in Tatahoma, WA

Not this week. But perhaps one will go through Tatahoma in the next month or so. It’s a strange way to run a grocery market, an entirely mobile fleet strategically positioned throughout the USA to offer the lowest possible prices by leveraging distance from key ports and food manufacturing facilities, but that’s what keeps the Trader Joe’s customers eyeballing the TJ “market deployment web” on their cellphones while they’re racing down the freeway. The prices. Or maybe it’s the chili mango slices.

“Trader Joe’s ... coming to your town ... soon?”

And there my answer to my anonymous interlocutor ended. But it reminded me of a slogan I came up with a few days ago for the sex toy industry: “There’s always room for sex toys.” You have to think fast, on your “feet” as it were in the ad business. I am meeting today’s challenges “head on” and am “strangling myself” with “my pretend tie.”


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