2004jul05. Two signs. Tokyo.
This is the best sign ever. Unlike 99% of all signs, it’s (A) not a warning about imminent death or dismemberment (B) incredibly human. We, as a people, will get together and rescue a little girl’s hat from the subway tracks. The hat symbolizes my future “career” options in the working world. The grabber device symbolizes acute pain.
Seriously, though, find a better sign. I triple dog dare you.
This really doesn’t look like an accident. This is one of those attention-starved babies that grows up to be some crotch-thrusting rock star. We have had enough of your attention-getting antics, rock star baby. Now you will lay there on the cold bathroom tile floor, writing lyrics for your next platinum album, but we’re not watching you at all. Oh, here comes a tiny limo to take you away from “all of this shit.” Rock star baby has potty mouth.