2003sep08. Inflight Magazine [2] [3] is a pseudo-inflight magazine that contains a history of hijackings up to the year 2000 (with a wholly unneeded detour to examine both hacker-related “hijacking” and the pieing of various corpo-politico scum), along with a fake safety card and “barf bag.” I’m still churning my way through the commentary, but the hijacking accounts feature one surreal episode after another:
The look on his face was a strange combination of amazement, amusement, and exasperation. “You know what?” he exclaimed. “I think this guy is asking for a credit card!” I leaned back in my chair and rolled my eyes skyward. “A credit card! You mean he wants us to pay for fuel so we can hijack ourselves?”
The hijackers peered suspiciously out of the windows. Was there something perhaps a little overdone about this enthusiastic welcome? The doors of the airplane remained closed. An official approached with a megaphone. “This is Pyongyang and we welcome you,” he called out engagingly. “Come down!” Well, perhaps it really was Pyongyang after all. One of the hijackers went to the main entrance door and was about to open it when another yelled at him to stop. Wait – something was wrong! He had seen a car of American make parked near the terminal building. And just then another hijacker turned on his transistor radio and heard English voices and jazz music. [ ... ] “This is not Pyongyang,” one hijacker shouted back through a cockpit window. “This is Seoul. If this is Pyongyang, show us proof!”
Aboard another hijacked National Airlines plane headed to Cuba, air pirate Tony Bryant brandishing his .38, takes a passenger poll: rich or poor? Then robs them accordingly. One stewardess graciously offers her wallet but he refuses. Black passengers are also robbery-exempt.