1999may13. Before I get into today’s topoic, I would like to SHOUT OUT to my homies, Scott and Jon, who have been making things Happen for Cardhouse for the last four years now and are now going through another Major Revision. Cardhouse wouldn’t be 1/10th as cool or even here, for that matter, without their tireless efforts. If you have time, drop them a line and tell them they are appreciated, unless you’re sort of busy or lethargic. I’m sure they’ll understand.
I just had a little brain fritz, and since everyone’s sick of the candy cigarettes, I will tell you what I am talking about.
The brain is quite a wonderful phenomenon, but sometimes it tells you to do a bad thing. “If you get up enough speed, you could probably ram that guy off the freeway ... I mean, he did cut you off and all.” We have learned not to listen to our brains when this happens, in most cases. But sometimes your brain just FREAKS OUT and gives you completely ridiculous information. It’s what makes your brain “cute” and want to hug it.
So I brought some chips and dip back to my desk to work on today’s EXTREMELY IMPORTANT article. Dug in, and realized there really wasn’t that many chips. So I returned to kitchen, got a fresh bag of chips, and made a small detour to pick up a huge bottle of cherry juice. Got back to my desk with the chips sort of dangling in my right hand, and the juice bottle in front of me in my left hand. Sitting on the desk just a few inches away is the dip container. This is when my brain freaked out. It’s classic misdirection – I wasn’t going to get the juice in the first place, and now my brain is processing the visible juice, and the seemingly missing chips. Just so you don’t think I’m a complete farmer, this is all happening in milliseconds.
At this point, my brain figures it out and says: “POUR THE JUICE INTO THE DIP.”
Hahahahah! Stupid BRAIN!